Pixels to Paper

I’m currently embarking on a very exciting project. Thanks to the support of a friend I can self publish copies of Tiger Tiger. Actual books I can hold and smell and hopefully sell.

That’s the scary bit, what if they don’t sell, what if I’m left with a pile of books that no one wants? A mere vanity project.

I have people supporting me who think that won’t be the case; my backer, the manager of my local Harris + Hoole who wants me to do a book launch there, the people who have bought the eBook and left a trail of 5 star reviews. It’s still scary though, the switch from pixels to paper and the possibility I’ll have a product that will please no one but me. Guess I just need to take a leap of faith…

 

The electronic version of Tiger Tiger is available for £1.99 in the Kindle Store http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B00D5EYHAM/ref=cm_cr_mts_prod_img

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“I love my rejection slips. They show me I try.”

Sylvia Plath is somewhat of a heroine of mine. I have an excerpt from ‘Mad Girls’ Love Song’ tattooed on my forearm. I like to lose myself in her words. I also like to look to her for inspirational quotes.

“I love my rejection slips. They show me I try.”

Is one of my favourites, and one that is uppermost in my mind today.

As well as Tiger Tiger I have another completed book, a children’s book titled ‘Grimalkin Grumblepuss and the Case of the Vampire Dentures.’ I recently submitted it to an agent who I felt was looking for books very similar to Grimalkin. I had high hopes. Yesterday I received the rejection:

“Thank you for giving me a shot with this. It has some lovely points, but when I take a new writer on I have to feel sure I can sell their book well, and I’m afraid I’m not quite there with this.

Of course it’s a subjective business, and another agent may well love.

Best of luck with it.”

It’s one of the nicest rejections I’ve received (trust me on this) and I’m trying to just cling to the positives in it. Though if nothing else it shows me I try.

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Tiger Tiger is available from the Kindle Store at a promotional price of £1.99 http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B00D5EYHAM/ref=cm_cr_mts_prod_img

An Artistic Temperament?

In June 2011 my life was very different to how it is now. After the breakdown of my marriage in 2009 I had managed to pull myself together and become a successful working single mother. I was a clinical nurse specialist in palliative care at St. Thomas’ Hospital. It was my dream job. All was good.

Well, apart from the increase in anxiety that I’d felt and the panic attacks that started sneaking in.

The panic started to get so bad that at work I would hide in the toilets and pray that no one paged me. I had friends I could talk to, my manager tried to be supportive though obviously she had a service to deliver and my emerging illness was interfering with this. As my health got worse I turned to the Samaritans, when I’m unwell using the phone causes me massive anxiety so I exchanged emails with an anonymous ‘Jo’. I knew that each ‘Jo’ I spoke to was a different person but ‘Jo’ was still a huge support.

Despite me talking my despair through with the ever understanding ‘Jo’ in late June I hit crisis. My head went to the darkest place it has ever gone to. I was terrified. Luckily I had a friend, Emily, who had experienced mental health problems herself and she fought tooth and nail to get me the help that I needed.

I lost my job. Probably for the best. Even with help I had to admit that I was very unwell, years of supressed emotions had come rushing out and my life would never be the same.

I’ve had two years now of not working, of being in constant contact with psychotherapists, psychiatrists, the wonderful people at Mind. I now have a diagnosis of Borderline Personality Disorder and still struggle with my condition.

One thing that has helped me through has been my writing. Since I’ve been unwell it’s been the thing that has given me an outlet, it’s given me an identity away from motherhood, away from my illness, something to hold up and be proud of.

You read a lot about people with mental health conditions being artistic, hordes of celebrities have regular walks with the black dog; I’m not sure if there is a correlation but a friend of mine who also has BPD suggested recently that the BPD was a tax on being fabulous. I’ll take that.

http://www.samaritans.org/how-we-can-help-you?gclid=CKz9voPIp7gCFQTMtAodcVkAkQ

http://www.mind.org.uk/

Tiger Tiger is available in the Kindle Store: http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B00D5EYHAM/ref=cm_cr_mts_prod_img

In My Hometown

ImageI’m back in my hometown, Stamford in Lincolnshire this weekend. Taking advantage of the sunny weather, looking at all of the beautiful stone architecture, feeding baby ducks down on the water meadows and tinkering about in all of the independent boutique stores that this quaint town has to offer. This isn’t all I’ve done though; Stamford has a rife coffee shop culture and many of these coffee shops are now adorned with posters promoting my book, I even had a little chat with a fellow Stamfordian who assures me she’ll be downloading it as soon as she gets home. Let’s hope that this ancient town that has been the backdrop for literary adaptations such as Middlemarch can get behind something a little more modern and embrace a year in the life of Rebecca Somersby.

Tiger Tiger is available in the Kindle Store. http://www.amazon.co.uk/Tiger-ebook/dp/B00D5EYHAM